


Alienation

by Sangerin



Series: The Returning Saga [6]
Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2001-02-01
Updated: 2001-02-01
Packaged: 2017-10-11 21:28:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,726
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/117310
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sangerin/pseuds/Sangerin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Neither Neelix nor M'Bai were permitted by Starfleet to leave San Francisco, let alone Earth. They were 'aliens', even to the cosmopolitan Federation, and Starfleet obviously didn't trust them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Alienation

He thought his heart would break.

Kes, in her time on Voyager, had become quite partial to Earth romance novels and holonovels. He blamed Captain Janeway for that particular interest of hers. Kes had explained to him that during these stories, the main character usually 'thought her heart would break' at least once. He had found that hard to believe, as human hearts were made of flesh and, while they might tear or rupture, could not shatter like one of the Captain's china teacups.

But now, with a tearful Naomi clinging to him and refusing to leave his side, he understood what had been meant by Kes' stories.

'Why can't Uncle Neelix come with us?' Naomi asked her mother.

Sam Wildman and Neelix exchanged worried glances, not sure what to tell the young girl.

'I have to stay here, Naomi,' Neelix said finally. 'Starfleet wants to know all about the Delta Quadrant and Talaxia, and I'm sure there's an Admiral or two around here keen to try some Talaxian cooking.'

'Besides,' said Sam, kneeling down next to her daughter. 'We're going to visit your Daddy's family. Neelix doesn't know any of them.'

'I don't know any of them, either,' said Naomi, pouting. 'You go - I'll stay here with Uncle Neelix.'

'Now, Naomi, your grandparents want very much to see you. And you'll be back in two weeks time,' said Neelix with a smile. 'I promise you M'Bai and I won't do anything fun until you get back.'

'Promise?' asked Naomi.

'I promise. We won't even think about going to Alcatraz or the museum until you get back,' Neelix answered solemnly. Naomi cheered up a little, but even so, Neelix could see the tears on her cheeks as her mother led Naomi to the Ktar shuttle.

And he thought his heart would break for the little girl. And for her mother, who had gone through so much during Voyager's ten years in the Delta Quadrant, only to find out on Voyager's return that Greskrendtregk had been listed as 'missing, presumed dead,' during the Dominion War. But no one, not even Admiral Rabb, had thought to inform his wife of the fact.

Looking at her tense face as she disappeared into the depths of the shuttle, Neelix guessed that Sam was not looking forward to her short visit to Ktar, and that Naomi's presence would be essential for her mother's sanity. But understandably, Sam wouldn't want Naomi to be aware of the tension.

Just as Neelix didn't want Naomi to be aware of the reason he couldn't travel to Ktar with them - he couldn't. Neither he nor M'Bai were permitted by Starfleet to leave San Francisco, let alone Earth. They were 'aliens', even to the cosmopolitan Federation, and Starfleet obviously didn't trust them. It rankled Neelix sometimes that Starfleet trusted Seven more than they trusted him. The former Borg had been allowed to go to Sweden with her family, while the Kims had been required to vouch for M'Bai, and Gretchen Janeway for Neelix. If either of them left San Fransisco, those responsible for them would be held accountable. It was a good system, Neelix acknowledged wryly. He would never do anything to place dear Mrs Janeway - Granny Captain, as even Naomi called her now - in difficulty. And Neelix knew that M'Bai felt the same way about the Kims, who had welcomed the young Nitiik with open arms.

So, they stayed in San Francisco. Some days M'Bai and Neelix explored the city together. They had spent a fascinating time in the tourist district of Chinatown, and on another day Harry Kim had taken them on a tour of Starfleet Academy. M'Bai had been inspired by the tour, and was more determined than ever to attend the Academy. As far as he was able, Neelix encouraged the youngster, but the Talaxian had quickly come to the conclusion, after arriving on Earth, that the Starfleet of Voyager and the Starfleet of the Alpha Quadrant were two entirely different things.

But it had been Naomi who had kept his thoughts upbeat. Though her age, nine Earth years, meant that she was in mid-Ktarian adolescence, her father's species had an extremely 'innocent' adolescence, so that Naomi's demeanour, for so many years precocious by human standards, had levelled off. She had been inordinately upset when she and her mother boarded the shuttle, but up to that time, she had not given her return to Earth much thought. Generally, the young Ktarian had enjoyed having other youngsters around her, but the stress of the trial had washed over her. Her refreshing attitude had been of great comfort to Neelix, allowing him to forget all the difficulties that seemed inherent in their arrival in the Alpha Quadrant. But now she was gone.

Neelix had, however, taken on a project to keep himself occupied, and within the city limits, until the Wildman's returned in two weeks' time, and, having left M'Bai with Harry, Neelix set about his task. Wandering from the Academy grounds to the nearby Headquarters complex, Neelix noticed a small café in the strip of civilian businesses that faced the two huge Starfleet campuses.

To Neelix, the café looked very pleasant. It was certainly not modern - the light-coloured wooden tables and chairs and the darker polished wood floor was nothing like the transparent aluminum and titanium that most restaurants and cafes in here seemed to use. The simple difference of the décor was refreshing to Neelix, and intent on his project, he pushed the door open and went inside. It was all but empty. Two Starfleet cadets sat at a table near the back of the room, and when he came in they stared at him for a moment, and then whispered together. Unsure of himself, and intimidated by the attention he was attracting, Neelix went up to the counter and spoke to the man behind the counter.

'Could I order a coffee, please?'

'Sure. What sort do you want?' answered the man, whom Neelix recognised as a Trill. Neelix looked down at his padd, and was trying to decide when the Trill continued, handing him another padd. 'Here's the list of what we've got. Choose a table and I'll come over in a minute to take your order.'

'Thank you,' said Neelix. He chose a table by the window, and then began comparing the two lists of coffees in front of him. Many of the items matched, and when the Trill approached him, Neelix was able to quickly order an Amaretto coffee. In trying to give the menu padd back, however, he accidentally gave the man his own padd.

'Sorry, this one isn't mine,' said the Trill.

Neelix was a little flustered. 'I'm so sorry,' he said, swapping the padds over.

'That's fine,' said the Trill. 'Are you working your way through all varieties of coffee?' he asked, then shrugged. 'The list was activated - couldn't help reading it.'

'I am, actually,' Neelix answered. 'A friend of mine gave me the list. She said I hadn't experienced coffee properly until I'd made a thorough survey of the varieties available.'

'Was she right?'

'I'm not sure yet,' said Neelix. 'I think I'm only about a third of the way through the list.'

'Well, in my personal opinion, Amaretto is a mighty fine coffee. I'll go and brew it up for you.'

'Thank you,' said Neelix to the man's back. The cadets at the back of the room were still whispering, and he knew that he'd been recognised. He was finally beginning to understand just why Commander Chakotay had disappeared during the victory party, and why Tom and B'Elanna had been so anxious to get away to Risa for their honeymoon. The entire Voyager crew had notoriety now - and being recognised all the time and everywhere was not all that one might expect.

During the trial, Neelix had the time to keep up with the press coverage - time the others hadn't had. News about the trial itself had been limited. News by those agencies regarded as 'reputable' had been minimal. But what Masako Kim called the 'dirt rags' had been vociferous. Every day they had churned out new stories…stories about the 'borgie babe' were illustrated with pictures of Seven, stories about the captain's two engagements were given headlines talking about the 'Ice Queen', and, not unnaturally, the press had picked up what had been said during the trial about New Earth, and had run with it as far as they could. Which had been a long way.

Seeing innuendo about the Voyager command team splashed across the news bulletins every day had been torturous for the whole Voyager crew. When the dirt rags had begun on Kes, it had been more than Neelix could stand. He didn't mind being recognised, but more and more, the person being recognised wasn't him - it was the person the media had created. If he was going to be famous, he wanted it to be on his own merits. Knowing it was impossible, he thought he'd rather avoid the publicity.

The Trill had returned with a cup of coffee that was emanating some delicious aromas. 'Here you are - Amaretto coffee. May I join you?'

Neelix hesitated slightly, but realised that at this point in time, he'd enjoy some chat. 'Certainly.' He sipped at the coffee.

The Trill sat down opposite Neelix. 'Well, what do you think?'

Neelix nodded slowly. 'Nice - I like the flavour. Is it almonds?'

'Yes. You didn't know that?'

'No, I'm new to Earth,' said Neelix, carefully.

The Trill had narrowed his eyes, thinking. 'I knew I recognised you - you're from that Starfleet ship that came back a few months ago. What was it? Voyager?'

Neelix grinned ruefully, not sure how he felt about being recognised so easily. 'Yes, that's me.'

'A Delta Quadrant native, right? You were the cook.'

'I prefer to call myself a chef,' said Neelix, with a burst of pride. 'Of course, I also acted as morale officer and ambassador.'

'A multi-talented individual,' said the Trill. 'But you were basically running a restaurant for ten years.'

'That's true,' said Neelix.

The Trill was regarding him thoughtfully. 'I don't suppose you'd be looking for a job at all? Nothing intensive,' the Trill hurried on, 'but I'd like to expand the repertoire here - and given the current interest, it would be marvellous to have some Delta Quadrant cuisine available.'

'It would be nice to have something to do again,' said Neelix, musingly. 'I'll need to have some flexibility,' he said. 'At the moment, most of my friends have left Earth - but the crew will have gatherings and duties in a few weeks' time. And Starfleet, of course...'

'Well, Starfleet is no problem - you'll be right across the road,' said the Trill, smiling and jerking his head towards the Starfleet campus, just out the window. 'So, do we have a deal?' he asked, sticking his hand out towards Neelix.

Neelix shook the Trill's hand vigorously. 'We have a deal - as long as we work out the details properly.'

The Trill laughed - a loud chuckle that suited the man's stout build. 'Starfleet has taught you well, my friend. By the way, my name is Savva. Savva Janis.'

'Neelix,' he said. 'But you probably knew that already.'

Savva just grinned. 'Finish your coffee, Neelix, and we'll get down to those details. What's the next variety on your list?'

* * *

Though the café had been almost empty the day Neelix had first discovered it, he found that during meal times it was a favourite of the staff and students of Starfleet Academy. The students, especially, seemed to order only the Delta Quadrant cuisine that was now on the menu, and Neelix was kept busy, not only instructing Savva's current staff in the preparation of Talaxian, Ocampan and Sikarian dishes, but cooking most of the meals as well. He had to be on hand to approve substitutes and oversee the others' attempts, and often found that he did not arrive back at his small apartment, close to the Kim family's house, until late at night. Each morning he was back at the café by 1100, preparing the lunch dishes. He was getting about as much sleep as he'd had while on Voyager, but at least the comments about his cooking were more favourable.

He'd been working at the café, which was generally known as the "Civilian", for more than a week, when he slept in one morning and didn't arrive until the lunchtime crowd was spilling onto the pavement outside. The whispering and inquisitive glances were so commonplace now that Neelix ignored the attention he was getting from those outside the café. He was almost at the laneway that led to the kitchen entrance when he saw the poster by the Civilian's door advertising a "Celebrity Guest Chef - straight from the Delta Quadrant to our tables...NEELIX THE TALAXIAN!!" For a moment, Neelix just stared at the poster, then he hurried into the kitchen.

'Savva!' he called, as soon as he closed the door. There was no answer, and Neelix turned to Jilly, the sous-chef, who was standing at the stove. 'Where is he?'

'Out front,' replied Jilly. 'Serving customers. What's eating you?'

'Publicity.'

'Huh?'

'I told him I didn't want a fuss made.'

'Well, tough,' said Jilly. 'Look - everyone on the planet knows you. Why shouldn't Savva make the most of his assets?'

'I'm just an asset?'

'Savva's running a business. You're a good investment, as long as you do your job - which is cook - and he does his. Marketing your cooking.'

Jilly's supercilious attitude annoyed him. But Neelix liked Savva, and didn't want to create a scene in front of all the customers, so he began working on that day's lunch dishes. The door from the dining room swung open and one of the young waiters rushed in. 'Good, you're here,' he said. 'The boss has been out of his tree. Two Kazon Specials, by the way.'

Neelix grimaced at the name that had been given by Savva to one of his specialties - Talaxian jeetah fruit with kerap sauce. Nothing would ever have convinced Neelix to call anything after the Kazon, but Savva had pointed out that most of the meals were made with what suitable substitutes Neelix could find, and that most of Neelix's recipes were approximations of human, Vulcan and Bajoran dishes he had devised during his ten years on Voyager. Neelix had agreed, but drew the line at his Agla'basq being advertised as anything but that.

'Coming right up, Ben,' Neelix called back, rushing to the other side of the kitchen to check on the kerap sauce. Jilly was not amused when Neelix pushed her gently aside and tasted the sauce. Neelix apologised breezily before rushing to put together the "Kazon" specials Ben wanted.

Cooking put him in a better mood, and by the time the stream of customers had slowed down, and Neelix and Savva had their lunch break in the mid afternoon, Neelix had thought through what Jilly had said to him, and decided not to complain to Savva. Jilly had a point, and Savva did have a business to run. So instead, as they sampled the next variety of coffee on the list Captain Janeway had given him, they discussed restaurant management, the orders for the next week, and various mundane things.

There were very few customers in the café, and when Savva was called out to check on a delivery, Neelix felt no great need to get back to work yet. Instead he dished up another helping of jeetah fruit and went back into the main room of the café to eat it. As he sat back down at the table nearest the kitchen door, usually reserved for the café staff, he noticed someone in a Starfleet uniform sitting in one of the high-backed booths at the end of the room. Neelix sent a questioning look to Jilly as she came past with two iced coffees, but she signalled that all the customers wanted were the coffees, and Neelix went back to relaxing.

Until, that is, he overheard part of their conversation.

'Are you sure - I mean, that cook of theirs works here...'

'Don't worry. After all, this is just an ordinary conversation, right?'

'Right...' The first voice quavered in its reply.

'So, what's been done?' The second voice was far more sure of itself - accustomed to giving orders, and accustomed to those orders being followed.

'Everyone is stalling everyone else,' replied the first voice. 'Kelson is the only real worry. He's so keen to get everyone reassigned. But they're actually helping us...the Captain is refusing to accept any assignment until everyone else is fixed.'

The second voice laughed. 'She's helping us to destroy her - how wonderful! And that little chit of a lawyer?'

'She's taking her exams in a few days time. It's all sorted. Med is expecting her next week.'

'Good. But keep her away from the hologram. We don't need any problems. What about Owen?'

'He hasn't noticed anything, and next week his son and the Klingon arrive home. He won't have time to poke his nose in anywhere.' Even before that, Neelix had been convinced that these two people were discussing Voyager. But the mention of Tom and B'Elanna confirmed it, and Neelix began to listen even more closely.

'Well, I have to say, this is going much better than the first plan - why didn't we do this straight away?'

'Appearances,' said the first voice. 'Justice must be seen to be done.'

The second voice laughed again, with a definite touch of vindictiveness in the tone. 'Impressive, Linda. Keep it up.'

Sensing that the conversation was just about at an end, Neelix got up and slipped quietly into the kitchen. He had finally placed the first voice, but not before the second voice had given her name - "first voice" was Linda Merran, the junior prosecution counsel from the trial. And Neelix did not like what he had just heard.

* * *

'We have gathered here today to remember our friends and loved ones,' began Captain Janeway. 'Over our years in the Delta Quadrant, we members of Voyager lost many friends. We had the chance, at the time, to farewell them, but we still remember them in our hearts. You, their families, may not have had this chance until now. We honour these, our friends, colleagues, and loved ones, today and each day, for as long as they live in our hearts and minds, they are neither gone nor forgotten.'

Then the captain began the long list. As each name was read, a photo appeared on the screens above the platform. Many of the photos had been taken by the Doctor during their journey, and each photo, and each name, brought memories back to the crew of Voyager.

The only names Neelix didn't recognise immediately were those of the Starfleet crew who had died in Voyager's violent transfer to the Delta Quadrant. Yet from the reactions to the names of Cavit, Stadi, and others, he could see that there were many people at the Memorial for whom, ten years later, their loss was still fresh in the mind.

As Neelix looked around Starfleet Academy's Grand Hall, he could see almost the whole crew, minus only the Doctor. The Wildmans had returned from Ktar, Seven from her visit to her family in Sweden, and Tuvok and Vorik from Vulcan. Tom and B'Elanna had returned from their honeymoon, and were sitting beside Owen and Roberta Paris in the front row.

Sara Kaplan's name was read, and Neelix thought fondly of the bright young Ensign who had died just before they encountered the Borg. She had been so nervous around senior officers, but so brilliant when she could work without pressure.

Kurt Bandera, killed during a battle against the Kazon, and Ken Durst, killed early on in their journey by the Vidiians. It seemed trite to recall the old Earth saying that there was 'not a dry eye in the house', but it was true. Even Captain Janeway's voice shook, and there were tears on her cheeks.

She reached the end of the list, and Neelix thought that the litany was complete. But Janeway spoke again. 'There is one more member of my crew who must be acknowledged,' she said. 'This crewmember did not die, but she did leave us, and those of us who knew her will always miss her dreadfully. I speak of a young Ocampan woman named Kes.'

And then, on the screen, appeared her picture. The curling red hair hiding her delicate ears, bright eyes shining from her beautiful elfin face. Whatever composure Neelix had been able to maintain, and that hadn't been much, deserted him, and he wept openly. The memorial went on, with Owen Paris giving a speech to which Neelix paid no attention at all. Then he felt a light hand touch his arm, and a voice whisper to him, 'Are you crying, Uncle Neelix?'

Swiftly, he wiped his tears. 'No, Naomi.'

'I think you are,' she said, climbing into his lap, despite her ten earth years and even older disposition, and giving him a hug.

'Thank you, Naomi,' he said to her. 'You always make me feel better.'

She sat with him until the memorial finished, when her mother came up to retrieve her daughter and check on her friend. 'Oh, Neelix,' said Sam, giving him a hug, 'You weren't expecting to feel this so much, were you?'

'No - I don't know what I expected, but it wasn't crying in front of the Admiralty. I miss her, Sam. After all these years, there's still a hole that only she can fill.'

'I know. We all miss Kes dreadfully. But to you, she was so very special.'

With Sam and Naomi, Neelix began moving towards the door. 'I need some fresh air,' he said. 'How was your trip?' he asked.

Sam didn't answer immediately. 'Naomi, honey - go and find Annie. She was sitting with her cousin, but I told Seven we'd look after her today.'

'Annie's here still?' exclaimed Naomi. 'Cool!' The little girl rushed away.

'It wasn't good,' said Sam to Neelix. 'The trip, I mean. It was almost more stressful than I'd expected. Gresky's mom - I'd forgotten how much she hated me. And it's worse now. She thinks I've been a bad influence on Naomi - Naomi doesn't know enough Ktarian, she doesn't know enough about the culture. I swear, Neelix, when Gresky and I were trying to get pregnant, he was going to teach the baby all that. I never dreamed - we never dreamed...' Sam stopped speaking, and Neelix could see the tears in her eyes.

'Come and sit down, Samantha,' he said kindly. 'You must have had a hard time.' He led her to a chair out of the flow of traffic, and settled her before grabbing another chair for himself.

'You know what hurts the most, Neelix? She didn't really want to see Naomi. Voyager got home a full month before anyone bothered to tell me that my husband died five years ago. I had to contact her, make all the arrangements, introduce Naomi. And none of them really cared.'

'Did Naomi notice?' asked Neelix, concerned by all this.

'I never really know what she notices and doesn't notice. But she's sharp as a tack - there's no way she could have ignored the tension. Or the yelling.'

'Yelling?'

Sam nodded. 'Oh, I'm not proud of it. But she had me backed into a corner.'

'Please - tell me what happened. Don't fret over it.'

The hall had cleared somewhat by this stage, so when a woman in a command uniform headed in their direction, it was clear she was coming to speak to them. Sam looked at the woman, a puzzled expression on her face. 'I know her,' Sam said, 'but I can't quite place her.'

The woman was Bajoran, and she had red hair, cropped close to her head. 'Lieutenant Wildman. You might not remember me - I'm Colonel Kira Nerys. I was second-in-command at Deep Space Nine during the Dominion Wars.'

Sam smiled. 'Major. Oh, I'm sorry, Colonel...I do remember you.'

'I wanted to express my condolences. Gresky was a wonderful officer. We have missed him.'

'Thank you, Colonel.'

Neelix stared at the colonel for a moment, then said, 'Why didn't you tell Samantha about her husband sooner? We've been in contact with Starfleet for four years!'

Kira looked at Neelix for a moment, then turned back to Sam. 'I'm sorry?'

Samantha looked embarrassed. 'Colonel, this is Neelix. Chief chef, Ambassador and morale officer of Voyager, and my daughter's godfather.'

'You have a daughter?' asked Kira in amazement. 'And, Mr Neelix, I'm sorry, I don't understand your question.'

Neelix was getting angry, although the colonel was so pleasant, and Sam so close to being upset, that he tried not to vent his anger on Gresky's old colleague. 'Lieutenant Wildman was only informed of her husband's status as "missing, presumed dead" by her mother-in-law, a month after Voyager returned.'

'I don't believe this,' said Kira, wonderingly, sitting down on a chair next to Sam.

'It's true,' said Sam.

'Oh, it's not that I don't believe you or Mr Neelix, Lieutenant Wildman, but I know that your name was on Gresky's file as next-of-kin. It was changed back just before Gresky died - when we found out from the Prometheus computer that you were still alive. But, the Dominion Wars caused a lot of chaos. Records were destroyed, went missing...I'm so sorry that you weren't informed.'

'Is there,' Sam hesitated. 'Is there any chance - any at all - that he's alive?'

'I'm sorry, Sam. But after five years, and considering the mission he was on, it's unlikely.'

'Please - could you tell me?' Sam pleaded.

Kira looked uncertainly at Neelix, who took the hint with a little annoyance. 'Sam - I'll go see if I can hunt up Naomi and Annie.'

'Fine,' replied Sam, but she wasn't really listening.

Neelix left the hall will only a single backward glance at Sam and the colonel. The Wildmans had been the victims of a monumental stuff-up, and Neelix doubted that the source of the confusion would ever be discovered. Personally, he suspected Samantha's mother-in-law, and he thought that Sam had probably reached the same conclusion. She would be unlikely to admit it, however.

'Neelix!'

He scanned the crowd in the courtyard, trying to spot both the children and the person who had called to him.

'Neelix - over here!'

This time, he caught Harry Kim's wave, and began to push through the crowd to reach him. The newly promoted Lieutenant Commander was standing with Caitlyn McBride and a young human woman who was introduced to Neelix as Elisabett Lattimore.

'Libby is fine, Neelix.'

'Ah, yes, the famous Libby,' said Neelix, wishing he could take the words back the moment he saw the look on Harry's face.

Caitlyn, however, just laughed. 'See, Libs - I told you there wasn't a single person on the ship who didn't know all about you.' She put a hand on Harry's arm. 'If you'll excuse me, it looks as though Admiral Louvois is trying to attract my attention. I'll catch up with you later,' she finished, and breezed off.

'I've got to go, too, Harry,' said Libby. 'I'm glad we were able to catch up again.' She reached up and kissed Harry on the cheek, then shook hands with Neelix. 'Nice to meet you, Mr Neelix, but art exhibitions wait for no one.' Then Libby walked purposefully out of the courtyard, leaving the two men staring - Harry at Libby's receding figure, and Neelix at Harry.

'Lieutenant Commander Kim?' said Neelix, hoping to catch Harry's attention. 'Harry?'

Harry shook his head slightly. 'Yes, Neelix, sorry, what did you ask?'

'I was wondering...' Neelix hesitated, then changed what he was going to say. 'How are you doing?'

'Oh, I'm all right,' replied Harry. 'I've been busy.'

'Weren't you planning a visit to Minnesota?'

Harry nodded. 'I was, but - well, it had to be put off.'

'And are your parents well?' said Neelix, thinking to himself that he had never before struggled this much in a conversation with Harry Kim.

'Yes, they're both fine.'

As Neelix tried to think how to continuing this trying discussion, a human male - a Starfleet officer - passed close by them, and noticed Harry.

'Hey - Kim,' called the man, who was about Harry's age. 'Coffee afterwards?'

Harry grinned, 'Sure thing, George. See you at the Civilian?'

'Right.'

Harry turned back to Neelix. 'George was in my first year Quad - I lost contact with him before I'd even joined Voyager, but it turns out we get along well. Hey...' Harry thought for a second. 'You're working at the Civilian now, aren't you, Neelix? Do you have to work today?'

Neelix shook his head. 'No - Savva gave me the day off.'

'Would you like to join us - we could go somewhere else if you'd rather not go near the place.'

'No, that's fine, and thank you for inviting me. Actually, Harry,' said Neelix, taking the opening now that Harry seemed to be better focussed, 'there is something I'd like to discuss with you. Something about the trial has been worrying me.'

'What?' asked Harry.

Neelix glanced around him and saw Linda Merran standing alongside a couple of Admirals nearby. 'I'd rather not discuss it here, but the café would be fine.'

'Don't worry about George,' said Harry, slightly mistaking the hesitation. 'He's a good guy - I totally trust him.'

Neelix narrowed his eyes. 'Are you sure? I hate to ask, but...'

'George was on the Clinton until last week. He wasn't anywhere near Earth during the trial.'

'All right. If what I'm worried about is true, we're going to need all the help we can get.'

* * *

The Civilian was Neelix's 'natural habitat' by now, and when he and Harry met George outside, Neelix took over the arrangements. The weather was lovely, so most of the tables on the pavement outside were full, but the tables inside were mostly empty. Neelix chose a table near the front window, from which they could see every other table in the room, and the outside ones. He ordered coffee and cakes from Ben, and then sat down with the others.

'Harry tells me you've been on the Clinton, Lieutenant Commander Mathers.'

'George is fine,' he said, grinning engagingly. 'Yeah, I've been on the Clinton. Ops officer, third-in-command. Just a little ship, patrolling trouble spots.' George's voice held a lazy drawl, but despite this - perhaps to counteract it - he spoke in sharp sentence fragments. The effect was slightly unsettling.

'And you've known Harry since his first year at the Academy? You would know Commander McBride, too, then.'

'Sure,' said George. 'McBride is one hell of an officer.' His glance slid over to Harry, who studiously ignored him.

Ben arrived with the coffee, a hazelnut blend, and a tray of cakes. 'Thanks, Ben,' said Neelix, hinting at the young waiter to leave. 'We'll be fine from here.' With a final glance at Harry, almost as recognisable as a result of publicity as Neelix himself, Ben went back to the kitchen.

Neelix jumped straight into the issue. 'I overheard a conversation the other day. It was here - the people who were talking don't know I was listening. At least I hope not.'

'What was it?' asked Harry.

'Two people, discussing what was being done to interfere with the reassignment of the Voyager personnel. And something about the trial, not going the way it was supposed to.'

'Supposed to?' said George.

'Who? Neelix, do you know who it was?' asked Harry urgently.

'I think it was Linda Merran. But she was the one taking the orders. There was another voice too - I didn't recognise it. A woman, I think. She was the one in charge.'

'Can't Kit handle this? Take it to JAG?' asked George.

'There wouldn't be enough evidence,' said Harry.

'No, and there was something Merran said about Kit, too,' said Neelix.

Harry said nothing, just looked at Neelix.

Neelix took a breath. 'She said that Kit was scheduled to take her exams, and that Med was expecting her.'

'Med?!' exclaimed Harry, doing a creditable job of keeping his disbelief quiet.

'Those exams were last week, right Kim?' said George. 'No results yet?'

Harry shook his head silently. Neelix took a sip of coffee, and George a forkful of cake. He bit into the cake, then swallowed, and then waved his empty fork in the air. 'Something's up. But what?'

Neelix shook his head. 'I have no idea. I came to you, Harry, because everyone else is so busy. Or else they've only just arrived today. I don't know what to do.'

Suddenly Harry stood up. 'I've got to go find Kit,' he said, and without saying goodbye, he rushed outside.

George watched him go. 'He's messed up good,' he said to Neelix. 'And that was before the conspiracy.'

'Do you think it is a conspiracy?'

'I've only watched the communiques,' said George. 'The arrests were ridiculous. Should never have happened.' He shrugged. 'Conspiracy's a possibility.'

'So, what now?' said Neelix. 'To be honest, I'm flummoxed.'

'No idea, pal.'

* * *

In the three weeks since the Memorial Service, Neelix had been kept busy at the Civilian. He was too busy to follow up his concerns about the overheard conversation, or about Harry's state of mind. And up until now, too busy to complain about the continued publicity about his position at the café as chef.

There was no doubt that the Civilian was becoming even more popular as a result of the "guest chef". There were no longer the lazy post-lunch hours when the staff could sit down and relax - now the flow of patrons hardly stopped. Starfleet - officers and enlisted - and civilians rubbed shoulders and devoured Agla'basq, jeetah fruit and whatever else Neelix managed to cook. Well known food critics had given him glowing reviews, and other restaurateurs made special trips to try the food, and if they were lucky, gain a tour of the kitchen and a meeting with the harried chef. Neelix had met some of the best Parisian chefs, the leaders in Betazoid cuisine, and to Neelix's astonishment, a Vulcan gourmet. But the visitor Neelix counted as the greatest was a creole/cajun cook - Joseph Sisko. Neelix and Joe got along brilliantly, and Joe invited Neelix to have dinner at his own restaurant in New Orleans one night.

Savva had been a little annoyed when Neelix asked for a weekend off, but Neelix reminded him of their agreement.

'This wasn't supposed to be an iron-clad contract, Savva. As I recall, we were each helping the other out.'

'And the restaurant is booked out for Sunday lunch. Everyone's expecting Talaxian cuisine.'

'Well, they wouldn't be if you had stuck to your end of the deal,' retorted Neelix.

'What's that supposed to mean?'

'We agreed, no publicity. I was just to cook my food and see if people like it. Instead you've turned this place into a media circus.'

'But what's the point in having a special angle if you can't exploit it?' asked Savva.

'I don't mind helping you out, and if you'd asked me about the publicity once I'd started working here, I probably would have agreed. But it's getting ridiculous. And what about those news crews that keep turning up. Admiral Janeway and her mother had to leave halfway through lunch last week because of the press.'

'That's the price of fame, Neelix.'

'Well, I can tell you, Admiral Janeway would rather not be famous. So she shouldn't have to pay the price. And she shouldn't have to worry that she's going to be betrayed by a friend's boss!'

'What are you saying, Neelix?'

'Who else would have tipped them off? You're so publicity hungry you'd take anything you could get.'

At that, Savva flushed red and his spots stood out darkly on his temples. 'I don't deny that it's been good publicity, having your crewmates in here every few days. I don't deny that I've made money out of you - the café is doing better than ever because of you. But I would not throw Admiral Janeway to the newshounds, and I can't believe you would accuse me of that!'

Neelix by this point was beyond being reasoned with. When Gretchen and Kathryn had hurried out of the Civilian through the kitchen to avoid the news cameras, and Neelix had seen his former captain stressed almost to the point of tears, he reached the breaking point. For a month and a half now he'd been putting up with the media attention, and enjoying the perks - including the admiration of the Alpha Quadrant's culinary establishment. And, he had been conscious just how much his presence had been helping the Civilian, and Savva. But all that faded away when he saw Kathryn Janeway being hurt by his notoriety. From that moment, four days ago, Neelix's resentment against Savva had been mounting, and the Trill's refusal to grant Neelix a full weekend off was the trigger.

Neelix stood up from the table in the back room where the staff now took their breaks. 'Someone tipped off those...' he hesitated, looking for the right word. '...scum,' he finished. 'I don't care if it was you, or if it was Ben or if it was Jilly. But you can cook dinner yourself tonight, and over the weekend. I'm going to New Orleans, and I really don't know if I'll ever be coming back here.' He slammed the kitchen door in Savva's face, and stormed past Ben and Jilly to his locker. He grabbed his things, slammed the locker door, and for good measure, slammed the outside door as he left.

* * *

'Don't you think you were just a bit harsh?' asked Joe, as Neelix finished off the remnants of his blackened fish and jambalaya.

'Harsh? No. Joe, I've seen harsh. Commander Chakotay breaking off with the Captain before his trial. That was harsh. This?'

'So, you were angry,' said Joe, signalling to one of his young workers to clear the table.

'I was furious,' corrected Neelix. 'You should have seen the way those scum were treating the Captain. They were there within a couple of minutes after she and her mother arrived - filming them through the window of the Civilian. Then one of the P'taK's got inside and started firing questions at her.' Neelix was getting angrier and angrier as he related the story. 'I was in the kitchen, but I'd come out with their appetizers - the Captain gets my special attention, of course. That young Ben would be sure to spill the food all over her. I came out, and saw Gretchen herding two of them out the door. The Captain was sitting with her head in her hands - she was almost crying, and I can't ever remember seeing the Captain cry. What could I do?'

Joe nodded, but didn't answer directly, instead telling Neelix that their dessert would arrive soon. 'So, what do you intend to do now?' he asked.

Neelix replied soberly, 'I told Savva not to expect me back. I don't know what I want to do - I've adored working there. But it isn't fair on the others.'

'The others?' asked Joe. 'Your old crewmates, you mean? Surely they don't affect your decision.'

'Of course they do, Joe. They're my family. They're all the family I've got.'

'Oh, I know all about family,' said Joe. 'My grandson's going to be a writer,' he said proudly. 'He tells me he already is a writer, but I'm waitin' for his first novel - then, I'll call him a writer. And,' he continued, 'My daughter-in-law is one of the prettiest gals there is.' Joe gestured to the piano by the door, above which was a small portrait of the younger Sisko family. 'And my granddaughter - well! What a little darlin',' he finished.

Neelix smiled.

'Then again, there's my son,' said Joe, a trifle sadly. 'I do love him, and his sister, but my Ben has been disappointin' me lately.'

'How?' asked Neelix, interested by the other man's story.

'He's always been a bit narrow-minded,' said Joe. 'Downright ornery if you ask me. But about those Maquis friends of yours, he isn't thinkin' straight.'

Neelix grimaced slightly, thinking of Sisko's stubborn testimony at the trial.

'You know,' continued Joe, 'I was hopin' that time with those prophets of his would knock some sense into him about the Maquis, but I guess his skull is just too thick. Problem is, he must have got that from me.' Joe came out of his reverie as Neelix grinned. 'What's happened to those pig's ears?' he called to the kitchen.

'Coming, boss,' came a muffled reply.

'Pig's ears?' asked Neelix. He knew that the human members of Voyager's crew would not have reacted calmly to such a menu item, but in his case, the question was merely one of interest.

'It's an old Cajun recipe,' said Joe. 'Called Oreilles de Cochon - it means pig's ears, because that's what the pastry looks like when you drop it in the oil.'

'Sounds fascinating,' said Neelix, eager to see this new food.

Joe timed his next comment well. The Oreilles had arrived and Neelix had just bitten into one when Joe said, 'You know, if you want to leave San Francisco, and you're looking for somewhere to cook, you're always welcome here. My customers will love your cookin'. It's nice and spicy, just the way we all like it. And I'd love to see you try a Jambalaya - it takes a real skill to cook a good one.'

Neelix had stopped chewing his pastry by the end of the first sentence. He swallowed his mouthful slowly, then swallowed again.

'That's a wonderful offer, Joe.'

'But you're not quite sure.'

'No.'

'How about you think it over. Now - are you going back to San Francisco tonight?'

'Yes. My goddaughter and I are visiting Alcatraz tomorrow.'

'Should be fun. That's the little Wildman girl, right? I met her dad once when I was visiting Ben. Lovely man, even if his name is unpronounceable for a human.' Joe got up to show Neelix to the door. 'You're trav'lin' courtesy of Starfleet I assume? That makes things a lot easier - no hanging about waitin'. You know, Neelix, I've really enjoyed this. If you decide not to come down here permanently, I'm still goin' to expect you here for dinner every month or so.'

'Thank you, Joe - that would be wonderful.'

'Bring your friends, too. No press allowed in here, and they all know it.'

Neelix's grin was almost as wide as Joe's as they both said goodnight, and Neelix headed for the nearest transport station.

* * *

Back in San Fransisco, Neelix had a short walk from the station to his apartment. The evening air was clear - though fog was expected, it usually blanketed the city in the morning, and at this point, Neelix could still see the stars. He had, in the last three or four months, grown used to the fact that the stars were no longer as close as they had been in space - after ten years of living on a starship, that had been an adjustment for all of them. For little Naomi, it had been a shock.

Neelix smiled, thinking of his goddaughter. The promised trip to Alcatraz was finally going to happen. He, M'Bai, Naomi, and Annie Hansen, who had not yet gone back to Sweden, were all setting off for a VIP tour the next morning. Neelix had missed the Wildmans dreadfully while they'd been gone, and, on the mental list he'd slowly begun to compile, he noted down a 'pro' for staying in the Bay area. As long as the Wildmans were in San Fransisco, he wanted to be there too. And Joe Sisko had made a good point, though obliquely, and possibly unintentionally. At the moment, Neelix had ties to Starfleet, and the Starfleet system. He got Starfleet priority on transport, and could transport easily around the continent. Starfleet itself had lowered their surveillance of him a few weeks previously, and though Neelix really had no wish to become a member of Starfleet, the way M'Bai did, he certainly didn't mind the associations he had with the organisation. Those ties and associations would be far easier to maintain if he stayed here.

Then again, staying in San Fransisco didn't necessarily mean continuing to work at the Civilian. But he had to admit he enjoyed working there most of the time. And, the large Starfleet patronage had come in handy - he'd overheard that conversation, hadn't he?

And Savva really was a good friend. He'd worked hard on the Civilian, and it was just beginning to take off. Neelix couldn't leave now - if there was one thing, other than exuberance, that Neelix had in abundance, it was loyalty. His loyalty to the Captain, to Admiral Janeway, would always come first, but Savva was his boss, and the first friend he'd made here since Voyager returned. And Neelix didn't want to let him down. But unless Savva could promise there would be no more leaks to the press about his friends, Neelix felt he couldn't go back to the Civilian.

When Neelix tramped up the stairs to his apartment and opened the door, his console was flashing to tell him there was a message waiting.

'Computer, display message.'

Neelix - Jilly admitted to me today that she told her boyfriend that your Admiral was coming for lunch. Her boyfriend happens to be a reporter. Rest assured that she won't be here when you come back. There's a cup of Columbian here with your name on it - Savva Janis

Neelix read the message through a couple of times, the first time cursing Jilly, the second time, wishing he could strangle the reporter. He went over to the replicator and ordered a cup of tea.

'Computer, reply to current message.'

'Ready'

Neelix took a deep breath. 'Savva - Don't fire Jilly, she's only just got the hang of making the sauce for my Agla'basq, and I don't want to train someone else. Add "Stuffed Mekra" to the menu, and get in a case of those zebra capsicums. I'll be in Monday morning at 1000 to fix lunch. And keep that Columbian warm - "NEELIX THE TALAXIAN!!".'


End file.
